The other day I went shopping and picked up a few (which turned out to be quite a lot actually) clothes for self and Pattu. I did some quick mental math (which involves me spreading out my fingers and toes and at times asking my company to do the same)… anyway, the point is, I realised that it would make an obscene bill. At this point, I commanded the objective, fair judge (in me) to take over and be merciless in throwing out irrational items from the shopping cart. And the objective, fair judge (in me) threw out 2 of the 3 items that I had picked up for Pattu while all my 3 items made it to the billing counter.
My friend gave me a shocked look to suggest, ‘a nice, selfless mom, aren’t you?’. I actually felt a bit shame shame and all that but I put up a brave face and didn’t show it.
There are a few more instances as well: If Pattu and I are both hungry, I gobble down a few mouthfuls (I can gobble down a full meal in a few mouthfuls, especially when I am hungry) before I even think of getting Pattu’s food ready (but then I am usually very quick to download my few mouthfuls). A hungry me is not a very pleasant sight. But of course if there’s only one plate of food between us, I’ll give it to Pattu (expecting Pattu to feel blessed).
That made me wonder, I can’t think of one instance where my mom has put herself before her children. And that brings me to the question, am I the only shame shame mom around or have we (as moms) changed?
Inviting all you moms out there to pour your guilt here. However, considering the popularity of my blog (the lack of it), I think it is a better idea to tag a few of you than leave it so open ended. So, the tag goes to Art, utbt and Vidya (because I think you all are very unlikely candidates to have done something like this). You have to:
1. Write about 2 instances where you have put yourself before your child/ children… been a wee bit selfish.
2. How did you feel? Did you feel a pang of guilt or were you comfortable?
3. Tag 2 more moms (I want to know I have company, you see **EVIL GRIN**)
Utbt had tagged me (long long ago) to list down my 5 fears. So, here I go.
1. Am I making the right choices for Pattu? I worry about the choices that I am making for Pattu. Am I doing the right things? There are so many theories, opinions, conventional wisdom and then there’s ones own instinct that is sometimes conflicting. I hope it turns out ok.
2. Children’s safety. I don’t have to say more. This planet seems to be getting more dangerous by the day, especially for the children. It is just so depressing.
3. Snakes – they visit our neighbourhood once in a while. Really!
4. The maid won’t turn up tomorrow! The maid, the nanny and the driver will ditch on the day I have an unavoidable meeting and hubby is not in town!!!! *SHIVERS AT THE THOUGHT*
5. That my smile won’t be returned and I’ll look silly.
Having said that, I never lose hope. I hope for a better life, better place, better world. I hope for the best, no matter what news I read/ see.
I think I am supposed to tag a few…so here you are: (the usual suspects) – Jayashree, Hema, Lavanya, Chotu’s Mom…
I just saw IHM’s post – I really hope her daughter gets well soon. Somehow, when children suffer, no matter who they are, the pain is just the same. Prayers.
Swati has tagged me to say seven things that people don’t know about me. I’ve seen this tag doing the rounds in blogosphere and here I am doing it now… So please fasten your seat belt, here I go…
1. I can’t drive (LOL – and I told you all to fasten your seat belt!). I’m terrified of traffic, cows, dogs and even the crows on the road! I’ve never even been on a bicycle *HIDING MY FACE IN SHAME*
OK, now that I’ve said this, it is easy to say the rest.
2. I haven’t seen snowfall yet 😦 … or for that matter never experienced single digit temperatures
3. I am absent minded. Once, when the family sat down for dinner I realised that I had cooked everything but rice! More recently I was frantically looking for my phone and went back to the rest room, cafeteria and rummaged through my desk for a good 15 mins when I figured out that I was talking on the phone all the while! I hope you’ll still read me and be my friends.
4. I guess I’m not a movie buff – If I count all the movies I’ve watched till date, I’m sure it would be less than 100.
5. The one thing I really feel bad about is the fact that I can’t sing! Not that I’m good at everything else, but I don’t feel so bad about it. A few maamis tried but gave up eventually. I have absolutely no sense of sound 😦
6. My childhood ambition was to become an underworld don. Well, I have a few months of Karate and and rifle shooting under my belt…
7. I cried when Dumbledore died.
And now its your turn ladies… I tag Lavanya, Jayashree, Apu and TPL